- Outdoor columnist Ben Smith says spending time with a friend is more than enough, even when the fish aren’t biting.
As we get older, we often lose touch with the people we grew up with, especially when we move away from the town we grew up in. That’s certainly true for me and the majority of the people I associate with today. I can count on one hand the number of people I went to high school with that I still talk to on a regular basis. And it’s not because those people aren’t special to me. My high school friends will always hold a special place in my heart, but after going our separate ways for over twenty years, it’s hard to keep in touch with all of them.
Then there are those few special people you stay in touch with long after high school. These relationships will most likely last until you die. You will go through different stages of life together, often asking each other for advice about the experiences you have along the way. Your children will grow up together. You will experience the loss of friends and family together. Your bond will be unbreakable. I can’t put into words how grateful I am to have a friend like this. A friend who knows me and knows where I come from, and is still a friend. Before I introduce you, I want to make it clear that I have a few close friends who I know would give me the shirt off their back if I needed it. I’ve written about some of them over the years, but this column is long overdue.
I don’t remember the exact day Ben and I met, but I do remember him absolutely flying in elementary school. And yes, his name is Ben, so this article might be difficult to follow! My earliest memories of Ben are of him being this short, skinny kid with glasses, outshining everyone else on the playground in Umbro shorts. I wasn’t a big soccer fan, so I didn’t know what the heck Umbro was. Does it even exist anymore? I digress. Growing up, there was nothing Ben wasn’t good at. Baseball, soccer, football, drums… the guy could do it all.
As we got older and went into high school, Ben was a star player on the Laurel High soccer team and the football team’s kicker/punter. He was also on the baseball team, but it was clear he was going to play college football (he later played at Liberty University). Not only was he athletic, but he was probably the nicest guy in school. He was never boastful, never hateful, he was someone you looked up to… and I did. Ben was in school a year ahead of me, so he got his license long before I did. He would often pick me up on the way to school in the mornings, and I owe my ability to drive a regular-stick car to watching him do it on those morning drives. Looking back, those were some of my best times in high school. I still remember the bumper sticker he had on his little car. It said, “Don’t let the car fool you, my baby is in heaven,” which was hilarious on that old Mazda, but also an apt description of his faith.
After high school, we both went our separate ways. Ben went to Liberty to play football and I went to Carey to play baseball. Every now and then we would cross paths and exchange words, but not much more than hello. Then one Sunday morning, everything changed. I was sitting about five rows back from the pulpit when our pastor marched a well-known couple onto the stage. He introduced Ben and his wife, Jaimie, to the church as part of the staff. I couldn’t believe it. My heart almost jumped out of my chest! You see, of all my childhood friends, there were only a few that I can look back on and know were truly concerned about my salvation. Ben is one of those friends. He would pinch me under the arm whenever I cursed to get me to behave. It’s a miracle I don’t still have bruises.
Fast forward to today. Ben and Jamie still serve at our church and Ben is still someone I look up to. His personality is infectious and I am a better person when I am around him. How many of your friends can you say the same about? And his wife, Jaime, compliments him so much. I remember her eating at Waffle House with us on Friday mornings when they were in high school together. She went to West Jones, but we still let her come with us even though we hated her school (which is still the case). Now we have kids the same age as we go through this season of life. We have all lost parents or in-laws and shared our grief, and we have celebrated life successes together.
Today I watched the sunset over the lake from my kayak. It was a perfect picture, so I pulled out my phone to capture the skyline. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Ben doing the same thing. Our last few fishing trips together have made me feel more at home than I have in a long time. As anyone reading this column already knows, I love catching fish. But if I’m honest, I could sit on that lake with Ben all day without catching anything and be content. Just the presence of an old friend is more than enough for me. If you’ve read this far in the article, I encourage you to reach out to an old friend you haven’t spoken to in a long time. You may never know how much it will mean to them. And if you want to take it a step further… go fishing with them!